To be perfectly honest, anything that happened in my life between Monday, May 16, 2011 and Wednesday afternoon, May 18, 2011; is a big pain-filled; drug-induced blur.
I don't remember much except swirling grey darkness and kind voices and gentle hands reaching out to comfort me from the darkness. My life became very focused on when the next time the little green monitor light would flash on my medication pump. Those last few minutes between relief could get excruciating. At those times I began to feel something else. Somewhere, out there in the world outside of this ICU, someone was saying a prayer for me. In those moments, I would find peace and rest; and be able to carry on to the next time.
I've been here in ICU for 12 days, now. Fully five days longer than originally planned. I've had some of the most terrifying and painful moments of my life while I've been here. Times when the pain in the broken parts of my face merged into one big throb; and others when they'd all perform their individual solos in exquisite detail. Other times - terrifying times - when my trache tube would plug completely closed. At those times there didn't seem to be a mollecule of air on this planet with my name on it. Trying to find air for lungs that are completely blocked from it is painful and frightening.
I went into this procedure fully expecting to become better acquainted with my Savior through the pain and suffering I expected to endure. ....and I have. In the quiet of the night, alone in my room, struggling for breath or against pain, prayer was the only relief to be found. I know prayer is what found me those scraps of air that kept me alive the other night.
But most interestingly enough, where I've become better acquainted with my savior has been through the hands, arms, and voices of those He sent to care for me from both sides of the veil. So often we hear how He uses us to be angels in other people's lives. I've seen this with the angels here in ICU and those taking care of my family at my house.
Yes, I've become better acquainted with my Savior throughout this process...but as usual; not in the ways I expected. I asked Him to teach me what He wanted me to learn from all this. As usual, it was in His way, not Netty's way. All I can say is that I'm humbled by this opportunity He gave to me.
Friday, May 27, 2011
Updates
Sunday, May 15, 2011
I have a dream...
It's not a HUGE - DRAMATIC dream...pretty simple,but pretty important to me.
I live a happy existance with the love of my life and our two beautiful daughters. My dream is to grow old with my sweetheart and watch these two amazing daughters find their sweethearts. Then I want to be the fun and whacky grandma that their kids can't wait to spend time with. I want to go out with my Kevy and serve missions for our Church, so we can share the joy we've found in the gospel.
The problem with my dream is that I have severe sleep-apnea. So severe that the breathing machine I use at night is not really keeping it at bay. Without surgical intervention to correct the small size of my jaws and open up my airway; I am almost certainly going to have a stroke or a heart attack.
So, tomorrow morning...BRIGHT AND EARLY...I will head down to the hospital in Provo and undergo a 10-procedure surgery. I go with the love and prayers of all my friends and family...here on earth; and those who have gone on before me. I feel the love and prayers of all of you. I need you to know that without them, I don't think I could face this.
To be honest, I'm a little scared. I also have great faith that God knows my heart and sees the value of my dream. With that faith, I can hope with all my heart to see my dream come true.
I love you all! See you when I'm all better!!
Hugs and kisses,
Netty
Thursday, April 28, 2011
Rites of Passage...
What seems like a minute ago,
I was buying this dress for my first 'baby'...
THIS dress for my first 'baby'...
Amanda and Joseph's first Prom...
It was definitely fun!
haha
(Isn't he handsome???)
(I get points for being able to spell it!)
in Amanda's book of life!
they heave a bittersweet sigh...
Monday, March 28, 2011
More Tender Mercies...
Today I have been blessed with the opportunity to take stock of the good things in my life. It was a nasty, cold, snowy, windy day. But periodically throughout the day, the sun seemed determined to remind me that it hadn't given up on Spring!
Each time it struggled to break through the storm, the sun cast the mountains around me in beautiful contrasts of light and shadow. I couldn't help but be grateful for getting to live in such a beautiful place.
I had to pay bills today. As I did, I realized how blessed I was to be able to pay my bills. In these economic times, so many people can't.
I thought with more than a little trepidation about the surgery I am facing in May. Rather than dwell on my fears, I thought of the gift of modern medicine that allows this surgery to help prolong my life. Also, the fact that we have medical insurance to help defray what will surely be a major expense.
As I rushed around to pick up my kids and run the errands needed to care for my family, I realized how lucky I am that Kevin has the kind of job he does. Because of him and how hard he works to provide for our family, I can stay at home and be the mom. So many other women don't get the chance to do that. I am SO grateful!
Finally, we went to our dear friends' house for Family Home Evening. The Price family is awesome. Warren and Marnee have really done a great job teaching and raising their kids. Joseph gave a lesson for Family Home Evening; about the Prophet, Joseph Smith, and the "First Vision"
The lesson was simple, but the spirit was sweet. My faith and testimony were strengthened. The kids were profound in their genuine expressions of faith and testimony. Their faith bolstered mine.
This day ended with another example of Heavenly Father's "tender mercies" in my life and that of my family. We had a wonderful family night with great friends who made us feel welcome and included in their sweet family. We left with our stomachs and spirits filled and our hearts overflowing with fellowship, testimony and love. Thank you, SO much; Warren, Marnee, Joseph, Matthew, Hyrum, and Abby!
It's been an awesome Monday!
What a great way to start our week!
Friday, March 18, 2011
DUCK!!!!!
...-LINGS!!!!!!!!!!!
Well, here they are! The newest denizens of Happy Acres!
and why I won't let her sleep!
Welcome to Happy Acres
and life at the ZOO!!!!!!!!!!
Thursday, March 17, 2011
Precious Moments...
Sometimes it's the little things that happen each day that make that day exemplary. Tuesday night it was the discussion we had over dinner. It probably didn't seem like much to the kids, but the conversation presented many opportunities for Kev and I to teach our children correct principles...without making a big "teaching moment" out of it.
Tonight, after Kev and I put away the last of our clean laundry, Jackie popped into our room to "chat". Again, the conversation turned to topics that allowed us to reinforce correct principles without coming across too "preachy" or "heavy". I consider these moments some of Heavenly Father's "tender mercies"; where we are given the opportunity to guide our children without seeming too pushy about it. Jackie & Manda probably didn't notice too much, but Kevin and I both recognized Heavenly Father's hand in these "parenting-moments" in otherwise ordinary days.
Here's another "tender mercy" moment from the Webster-archives... A Sunday outing to Temple Square. The bag contains lunches that the girls made so they could give food to the homeless people in the area. 
In this picture, the girls are heading for a homeless man sitting next to the wall ahead of them. It's one of my favorite memories...
Sunday, March 6, 2011
Mandy has had an eventful week...
After the final performance on "Closing-Night", the cast let off a little steam so the parents could take pictures...
(That's Amanda with Joe's little sister, Abby)But thanks to Joseph, the evening ended with a bang!
