Tuesday, January 28, 2014

You're never too old...

You're never too old to learn, and you're never too old to change - hopefully for the better.

I've had some experiences over the last few weeks that have taught me that lesson - again, but at a different level than before.

First of all I learned (again) that my mom was right. Lol! I'm sure she'd love hearing that! My mother always said that your good reputation is invaluable, and that I should guard it like the treasure it is.  She said that once lost, that good reputation is difficult, if not impossible to regain.  In addition to that, I had a wonderful example in my Dad.  If I had to sum up my Dad in one word, I would say "integrity".  Dad always taught us to "Say what you mean, and mean what you say."  He drilled it into us to "do the right thing at the right time for the right reasons, every time!".  Because of his example, I've tried to live a life of honesty and integrity.

This stood me in good stead as recently, my integrity or at least my honesty was called into question.  I won't go into details, but suffice it to say that I was accused of doing something that I hadn't done.  In spite of my repeated assertions (and proof) to the contrary, I was believed to have been dishonest.  Although not being believed hurt my feelings, I knew I had been honest.  In the end, my good reputation was upheld, and my integrity was proven once again.  Being judged falsely is never fun and often painful.  However, I knew that I was "square with the Lord", and His opinion is the one that ultimately matters.

Last week, I was approached by a woman who gave me her name and number and asked me to call her.  As I was in a hurry, she said she would explain when I called.  I couldn't imagine what she wanted (since I had NO idea who she was), but I joked with Kevin that she probably owned a "fat-farm" and wanted me to come get help.  Being polite, I called her.  I got her voicemail and left her a message.  Curiosity won the day, so I looked her up on Facebook.  Imagine my surprise and dismay when I discovered that my initial (joking) assessment was correct.  She is a weight-loss/lifestyle coach.  For whatever reason, this just hurt.

Maybe I am too sensitive, but let me explain why it hurt.  This woman had seen me during the course of a couple of hours that we were in the same place, and made some snap judgments.  Without bothering to get to know me, find out anything about me, or even learn my name, she judged me.  She looked at me and saw a fat person - she saw a size, not a person.  Maybe her intentions were good.  In fact, given what she does for a living, they probably were.  However, that doesn't change how her actions made me feel.  If she had taken a moment to talk to me, she'd have learned that I am on a healthy life-path, and that there is SO much more to me than my size.  I am fully responsible for allowing her actions to bring me down.  I hold no one but myself accountable for my feelings.  I am not proud to say that I let what she did bother me and make me sad for a few days.  I also let it teach me something very valuable, which to me, was worth being sad for a little while.

Ultimately, here's what I've learned.  My parents were right, again!  I hope they heard that in Heaven and that it makes them feel good.  I am grateful for goodly parents who taught me important lessons that still help me.  It didn't matter if the whole world didn't believe my honesty.  I knew I was alright in the sight of my Heavenly Father, and that was what mattered.  I can't help what other people might think of me.  It doesn't really matter, after all.  What truly matters is that I know who I am.  I know who my Heavenly Father expects me to be, and as long as I'm doing my best to live up to that; I will be ok.  The weight-loss/lifestyle coach taught me the importance of not casting judgments - of looking past the surface and giving people the benefit of the doubt.  I knew that, of course, but she helped me learn it on a higher level.  I will certainly be more careful in my life and in my dealings with others.  I never want to make another person feel the way I did.

Doing our best to live a Christ-like life of honor and integrity and not being so quick to judge are valuable lessons that we are never too old to learn.