After...

"Happily Ever After"...

Have you ever wondered what happens after the characters in the fairy-tale romances ride off into the sunset for their "Happily Ever After"?  Do all the moments after that epic climax stay perfect in the rosy-glow of sunset? How do our fairy-tale heroes and heroines handle the bumps in the road of everyday life? And do they truly stay "Happily Ever After"?

Thirty years ago, Kevin and I took our first steps into our own "Happily Ever After". Our wedding day was everything I ever dreamed it would be. It was as perfect a day as I wished for.

Two days later, we packed up my life and drove off into our own sunset. Then reality happened...

I immediately had to find a job. Kevin was in his last year of college. We had to learn how to be happily married, and then I unexpectedly got pregnant. (We were actually trying NOT to get pregnant) We were adjusting to that new dynamic when I miscarried (the first of 10). We were newlyweds and now we had to learn how to go through grief and sorrow together. 

Thirty years ago....and yet it seems like yesterday. When we got engaged, I remember thinking "Wow, when we've been married 20 years I'll be 45...and 55 on our 30th anniversary!" It seemed so far in the distant future. Yet, here we are...

Over the last 30 years we've gone through some hard things. We've had some crazy adventures and laughed a lot. We've had some more grief and sorrow and helped each other weather every storm. When I reflect on the 30 years of our marriage, the golden thread running through the picture in my mind is love. Love for each other, love for our Heavenly Father, and love for the family He helped us make. That love and our partnership with our Heavenly Father have been the glue that kept us strong and kept us together. That and a really whacky sense of humor. 

When Kevin told his parents that he was going to ask me to marry him, after his dad quit laughing; he said, "Well, you'll never be bored!!!" Kevin would tell you that his dad was right, and he never has been bored. That's the benefit of having a really warped sense of humor and an ability to laugh at your own foibles.

Alan Jackson wrote a song entitled "Remember When...". It has become "our song". 

"Remember when 30 seemed so old? Now looking back, it's just a stepping stone - from where we are, where we've been, swore we'd do it all again...remember when?

Remember when we said when we turned grey, when the children grow up and move away; we won't be sad, we'll be glad for all the life we've had...and we'll remember when..."

Kevin and I both have said that we'd do it all again...all of it....

I guess that kind of answers my original question - do they stay "Happily Ever After?". 

Living our lives with the love of our lives IS our "Happily Ever After" because the hard things are bearable when you share them with your sweetheart and help each other through them. Conversely, the good and happy things are exponentially better and happier because you have someone with whom you can share the joy. 

So, Kevin...on the 30th Anniversary of OUR "Happily Ever After", here's to us and an eternity of more happiness-ever-after!  I would still say "yes", and would do it all again if it meant that I got to spend my life with you.

Happy Anniversary, my handsome-Prince!  I love you more!

                                       

Happy Mother's Day

To my grown-up daughters;

This Mother's Day, I wanted to dedicate this post to you because you're the reason I get to celebrate this weekend. 

To my Mandy;

You made me a Mommy!  Oh what fun we had as we both began this mommy-daughter adventure!  You were my little-bitty-buddy. We did everything together. You gave me the gift of seeing the world through a child's eyes again. Oh, how I loved getting to be your mommy!

Much too quickly, you changed from my baby into a lovely young woman. Oh how I loved being your mom - every step of the way! What great friends we've become!  How I love the relationship we're developing. I love our theater/movie-dates. I love that we can  and do talk about everything. I am grateful that you trust me enough to talk to me about so many things. I'm blessed to count you among my dearest friends!!!

To my Jackie;

You were my unexpected blessing!  When we started the adoption process the second time, we thought you'd be a baby...and a boy!!  What a delightful surprise we had when we realized that we were going to add you to our little family!  How amazing that you fit into your spot in our family so seamlessly!  Right from the start, you wound your way around the hearts of every family member. I'll never forget watching Bonpa see you for the first time. I swear I heard his big ol' heart fall 'SPLAT!!!', right at your feet!!!

As it was with your sister, you grew up way too fast!  But what fun we had, you and I!  How many driving-adventures have we had? Silly times, funny times - times when we scared each other-silly! How grateful I am for your fun and funny personality. I have loved the times I got to be around you and your friends. Y'all never failed to make me laugh. How grateful I am for your creative-artist's-soul. You taught me to see the world through different eyes. You see the world through an artist's eyes and have taught me to look at things on a deeper level. Thank you for that. I love our relationship. I am grateful to be your mom and your friend. You...my unexpected blessing.

To both of you;

One of my favorite songs describes how I feel about being the mom to two such wonderful daughters...

"In my daughters' eyes, everyone is equal. Darkness turns to light and my world is at peace. These miracles God gave to me, give me strength when I am weak. I find reason to believe, in my daughters' eyes.

In my daughters' eyes, I can see the future. A reflection of who I am and what will be. And though they'll grow and someday leave, maybe raise families, when I'm gone I hope you'll see how happy they made me; for I'll be there...in my daughters' eyes." (paraphrased from Martina McBride's song)

Getting to be your mom has been one of the greatest gifts of my life. So on this Mother's Day, I thank you for giving me the gift of motherhood. I love you both with all my heart - I always will.

Happy Mother's Day!