Blowing in the wind...

"Alzheimer's is a type of dementia that causes problems with memory, thinking and behavior." ..."Symptoms usually develop slowly and get worse over time, becoming severe enough to interfere with daily tasks." *from ALZ.org, the Alzheimer's Association Wow, that sounds so bland for what this hateful disease really does to a person. Kevin's Mom - my dearest mom-in-law, Doris; has had this hateful disease for more than 17 years now. Kevin said, the other day, that Mom is a mere wisp of who she was. That got me thinking... Watching Mom live with Alzheimer's over the years has been like watching a dandelion that has gone to seed. Bit by bit, memory by memory, pieces of our beloved Mom disappear like dandelion seeds in the wind. At first, it's just losing the car keys, or forgetting where she left her glasses. Nothing too earth-shattering... Can't do math or handle a checkbook...not too bad...that's why we're family - we take care of each other... It's not safe to drive, really can't live on her own - we've got this!!! We'll do it and she'll be safe with us. Can't tend her own personal needs...we can't provide enough care. Who do we trust with our beloved Mom??? How can we let her go to strangers??? Our hearts are breaking. She knows we belong to her, when we visit the lovely home to which we entrusted her. She hasn't spoken our names for years. Much of what we say is beyond her ability to understand. She can't sift through the Alzheimer's-mud that's clogging her mind to find the words to communicate with us.  She's lost...one piece of her at a time has blown away until she is lost to us...lost in the confusion and fog of this most hateful disease. For all that - for all the sorrow we feel at seeing her this way, to us she will always be our beloved Mom and Grandma...